Today we went to McDonalds for lunch so Malak could have his first happy meal, because he is 18 months old today and what else would you do on your 18 month birthday??While we were standing in line this went down...
An older African-American gentleman puts his hand on my back and says:
Him: Excuse me, are you Madonna?
Me: Huh??
Him: Are you Madonna?
Me: Uuuuh....no?
Him: I was just asking because you have glamorous sunglasses and a black kid.
Me: Oh.....uh, haha. (awkward fake laugh)
Him: Or are you Angelina?
Me: (half smile, with not much of the fake laugh left)
Him: Is it the cool new thing for white people to adopt black kids?
Me: Well, if they need to be adopted... (I can't tell if he has a weird sense of humor or is just being rude)
He walks away while I'm talking. (So I guess he was being rude.)
He comes back a minute later and says: So, since I'm black should I adopt an Asian kid?
He rolls his eyes and laughs.
Me: Sure, feel free! Every child needs a family.
He didn't say anything and just walked away.
Side note: I realize that there are about a million things I could have said to that man...but in the heat of the moment, I was kind of dumbfounded. Especialy since he had such an awkward way about him. Now, I am thinking of all these great things I could have said...instead, I was like, "Duuuuh, ummmm, uuuuh...." I guess it didn't help that he walked away every time I said anything. Oh well! Now I am fully prepared for the next time anyone questions my family!
Here is an update on Malak and what he is doing at the ripe old age of 18 months...
He is ALL boy. All day long he runs around the house screaming with his tongue out, throwing toys. He chases the dog for hours with his push car thing and try's to run her over. Poor dog jumps on the couch to get away from being run over and he just ditches the car and tries to pull her paws and hug her endlessly. Ok, I'm realizing that this makes him sound bratty, but he is actually just playing and entertaining himself and is just BUSY. He doesn't really play with his toys much, just chucks them as hard as he can across the room and runs to get them so he can throw them again. :) Honestly, I kind of love how much of a boy he is, we play outside for hours and he just wanders around exploring and playing with sticks and grass, kicking balls, "mowing" the lawn. He is talking so much now! He repeats anything you ask him to say and some of his most favorite words/phrases are: octopus, there she is!, dangerous, not yet, thank you, aaaw man!, raisins, oopsy, eat, diaper, poop... and tons more. I'm pretty sure that yesterday he said, "Hey Tara!" He is SO entertaining these days and Eric I just sit and laugh at him all the time. He just had 6 teeth come in...so that was a 3 week long nightmare. Ugh. Teething is evil. SO glad those broke through and he almost has a full mouth of teeth!
He also was playing with his bottle of Hair Milk and figured out how to open it...and how to eat it. (Remember this post?)
It was sad times when I cleaned him up and took away the delicious lotion. Poor guy... all he wants is a little moisturization! (side note: the perk of using all natural products around the house, if your kid snacks on it, no harm done!)
We got Mal out of bed the other day and he looked like this. Sexy right? Off the shoulder is SO in.
I am a big fan of tan lines in the neck rolls. :)
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33 comments:
Weird, Tara! That story about McDonald's made me so uncomfortable. I keep thinking about what I would say if that happened to me. A lot of awkwardness.
So, a lot of cute pictures of Malak! I think my favorite is his off the shoulder look :)
Umm...Awkward...
Anyway. Your boy is so stinking cute! I want him and India to play together so bad! She is all boy too, so I think they would get along just perfectly.
Yes, very awkward. I have no idea what I would have said. You said the right things.
And oh my goodness. I love that Malak is all boy. How much fun!
Sorry that some people are so weird. Ugh! What was he thinking?
More importantly...how cute is Malak?! Oh my gosh...too cute! I can't believe he is saying so much! Y'all need to take video and post soon of him talking. :) Congrats on all the new teeth...I bet you are glad they are in and not still coming in!
Happy 18 Months!!!
Gosh you were a lot nicer than I would have been!
Malak is such a cutie! Hope to see you at The Queen again soon. We got our referral for a baby girl and are hoping to pass court on April 30th and traveling on May 23rd! I'll be bringing pics next time!
Julie
www.jamullins.blogspot.com
Your McDonald's episode is very strange, or rather that dude was very strange. Some people just seem to think it's their business to tell you what they think, and then they seem to do it in the weirdest way possible.
In an unrelated McDonald's story I met a lady at our local McD's several months ago. She had a little boy with her who I was sure had to have been adopted from Ethiopia. I finally worked up my courage and asked her if that was the case. I was right and then explained that I had an old friend (you) who had just done the same thing. She asked where you were from and after a few more details we figured out that she has visited your blog from time to time. What a small world! There I was at McDonald's in Juneau, Alaska talking with a lady who had come across your blog and life in OKC because of a connection to Ethiopia. And it wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for Camp Yamhill. Ahh, yamhill.
Have a good day, Tara. Malak is very blessed to have you and Eric as parents.
You handled that so well, I'm not sure what I would have said.
Cutie Malak- so precious and getting so big.
First off - weird situation at McDonalds. Sorry you had to go through that.
On to more important things - Sweet Malak! He is so darn cute. I love the off-the-shoulder look - he works it.
I cannot believe that someone walked up to you and said that stuff. You handled it very well. I don't know that I would have been as gracious!
Malak - as always - is adorable!
Wow. That story made my jaw drop and my cheeks turn a little pink. How awful. Wow.
As for the pictures- such a beautiful little boy you've got. SO HANDSOME!!!
Holy Cow!!! I cannot believe that man said those things... you actually spoke I don't know if my jaw would have allowed me. So, great job!!!
It's good to hear some honesty on tough things we all may encounter (too bad). Thank You!!
And, thanks for the adorable updates on Malek :)
I don't know what I would have said to that man either:-( I hate that we are going to have to deal with these rude types of comments...
Mal sounds a lot like Pacey in the throwing toys, putting things in toilets and running around like crazy:-) I love it!!
Awkward definately. We encountered our first absurdly opinionated person this week who thought it was o.k. to spout their opinion to us regarding our adoption. I was kind of like you. I thought of all the things I should/could have said after that fact. Which was probably o.k., because there is no need to really respond to such ignorance.
But the best part of that is how cute Malak is! He is really getting big!
so sad that you had an awkward moment. sometimes people are just full of anger and direct it at whomever is in there path. maybe he'll reflect on how he treated a family he didn't even know. we can pray for his conscience to be pricked a bit!!!
BUT anyway, Mal is ADORABLE and he and Sam would tear up the house together! Seriously, we must meet in person some day :).
love
becca
Yuck! We've had a couple weird comments thrown our way. So uncomfortable and I can only think of a great response after the person walks away - I tend to go deer in the headlights while they're talking.
As for the fabulous Mr. Malak - so, so cute!! I love this age!
You always surprise me 'cause you tend to handle things like that so well.
Most impressive.
PS Mean people suck.
that man was a weirdo. . . why did he assume your hubby wasn't super dark or something? People are nuts!!! what a cute little guy! his fondness for eating moisterizing products is interesting! just wait til 2.5 years when those DANGED 2 year molars come. . . they are WAY unfriendly, hopefully you have a reprieve for the next 6-12 months :)
So in hindsight... what do you wish you had said? Cause I'm sitting here wondering what I would say. I mean...what are the things you SHOULD say, as opposed to all the things you want to say that would make you feel better but probably wouldn't help the situation :-)
In the past when I've had people ask if I"m adopting because I'm "like Angelina." I've said with a smile, "sure, if you think I'm a gorgeous, super-fit, humanitarian who just wants to make a family while maybe helping out a child in need...than yeah, I'm just like her." So far that seems to work but I wonder if it's the right thing, or if it will do the trick once I have my child by my side. hmmmm... it's a hard conversation.
But on the easy side... I agree, there is nothing better than a Happy Meal for your 18th month bday!
McDonald's man needs a big mac sized spanking! What an el jerk-o!
I do kinda want to call you Madonna now. But only because I like her and I like you and you are a superstar for being Jesus to that dumb head man!
You have the cutest little boy there! Watch out... I smell a heartbreaker coming on!
what a terd!! maybe he was jealous because years ago he needed someone like you to adopt him :)
i'm glad that you kept your cool. honestly, he needs jesus just as much as mal needed him.
That is a very awkward and downright rude thing that happened at McDonalds. I am afraid this might start to happen more often with all the press Madonna and Angelina are getting.
On another note, I love seeing new pic's of M. He is so handsome!
Wow, I am impressed with how you handles the McDonald's situation.
Too bad people don't always see things the way we see it.
Malak is so cute. It looks like you guys are really enjoying him.
McDonald's man lucky it was you and not me because I would have punched him. Yes, I know...a shining example for my children.
It is really unfortunate that some people don't see the "good" in adopting a child in need. I've always said it is the "adults" that make an issue or make it awkward...kids don't see color, or care. Really sad. But GOOD FOR YOU for not just blowing up and telling him off. Hopefully he walked away feeling a little shallow and insensitive. Probably not. Malak is adorable and always seems so happy. What a great life you are giving him. Kuddo's to you and Eric!!!
oh yes!! baby girl is chubbin' up for sure!!
Wow, what an awful exchange! I don't know what I would have done in that situation, I think you handled it great! You answered him honestly and earnestly. Malak is a blessed little boy to have such a great mama!!
wow. uber awkward...stupid people, i wanna kick them in the shins.
Hey Tara!
I've been reading your blog, I love it! I am almost 12 weeks pregnant, so I've been getting ideas and tips from you... you just didn't even know it!! Hah. Especially on the cloth diapers, I've been researching. Malak is totally adorable, I love all his cute pictures. I am keeping a blog about my pregnancy, so now I am breaking into the whole new world of blogging. Its quite addicting!
Leah Brown (StorkStruck.blogspot.com)
wow, can't believe what happened at McD's! Sorry, you handled it well! I guess it happens when you least expect it, huh? People don't always understand what God lays on our hearts, when they simply (ignorantly) play the race card. Gives us something to pray for them about.
Precious boy!!
what is up with the neck roll tan lines--our kiddo has them too?
anyway, gosh about McDonalds man: that was pretty lame...
So I am finaly coming out fro the blog stalking closet! ha! Thanks again for meeting with us last weekend. We have our phone orientation next week! Exciting!!
So my husband and I have 7 beautiful children...and we are the ONLY white folk in our family. OH yeah, comment like that would maybe have upset me, but then I realize that these people need Jesus!!! As my beautiful 9 year old daughter would say- we are all brown actually. Of course she is right, and how can you argue with that. Our 7 year old would have said...at least I get to have a mom and dad there are lots of children without parents. People are people, and families are families!!!! I love mine!!!
About the natural products... Good thing I use natural stuff 'cause I found Cody with one of my cleaning squirt bottles spraying it into his mouth! Luckily a little baking soda, vinegar and lavender never hurt anyone! Why, though? Gross...
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